Small Child

Photos

2007-09-22T14:05:00.000-07:00

I was talking to Raymundo the other day. He is from mexico.. and guess what?! He sent me MORE pictures! yaaaay! Pictures!

So... here you go.. feast your eyes on pictures of my favourite family :) I love them so much, and I miss them even more :(

This is Lizbeth. I'm sure she just LOVES this picture. hahaha. But... even though she is eating.. you can still see how gorgeous she is. I told Raymundo to tell her that she needs to stop lying to herself and admit it. Look at her! She is SO pretty! And she thinks that she is ugly.. and FAT! What the heck Liz.. look at yourself.. you're absolutely magnificantly gorgeous! Am I right or am i right? I kept trying to convince her while I was there that she is beautiful.. but she wouldn't believe me. Do you think she is beautiful? Its kinda hard to see it in this picture.. but look at the next one too.. thats the whole family.

So this is the whole family. They got together for Raymundo's sisters 15th birthday. In Mexico

15 is like a HUGE deal. 15 to them is like our 16.. except there parties are much bigger. Limo.. WHOLE bunches of money. and liek the whole town is involved.. its HUGE.His sister is
in the purple dress in the middle.. and his gramma is the elder lady on the side. Lizbeth is in the green.. Abi is in front of her. Danna is in front of Raymundo's sister.. and beside Danna is Yari. Behind Yari is Asael. Cute family eh? I miss them. I laughed SO hard when I got this picture though.. If it was bigger you could get a closer look.. but look at Dannas face.. she looks SO peaved! I asked Ray why she looked so angry and he said she wanted to play and they made her stop playing and come take a picture.. haha she wasn't to happy about it as you can see. Oh mann.. look at all of them! They look so beautiful! I can't wait to see them again. I can honestly say with pride that The best part of my whole mexico trip was this family. This family has made the biggest impact on my life out of every single thing I could've seen or any of the people I met. I love these people with all my heart.. and I can't wait to see them again soon. Everytime I talk with them they tell me how much they miss me and it makes me realize all over again how lucky I was to have been able to meet all these amazing people or God.. and how loved I am.. even people that are in a completely different country are telling me how Much I am loved.. and hoe much god must love me and how much he must them, in order for him to have let us all meet. And I totally agree. Everytime I talk with them I am just thanking God more and more that he let me go, and that he let me meet these people.. because I love them with all my heart.. and I can't believe that I have people that love me that far away from me. and it makes me feel so special! They say that they are privilaged to have been able to meet me.. but no no no.. i think its the other way around. I am so... privilaged to be able to have met them.. and to stil be apart of their lives. Its really amazing to me sometimes.. how much God loves me.. and cares for me. I'm so happy he found a way to let me go to Mexico in the summer of 2007.. and I hope he allows me to go again in the summer of 2008. they are all hoping and praying I get the money to come in so that I can see them all again really soon. Lizbeth even told me that I could stay with her so that I don't have to get a hotel room.. AND she asked me to stay for the whole two months! holy cow! I can't wait.. I am just hoping that God will provide a way for me to go.. in fact.. I know he will. :)

These are my three little beauties. [from left to right, and youngest to eldest]

Yari, Danna and Abi. These are the cutest and sweetest little girls you could ever meet! I bonded with them so much when I was there!! I can't wait to see them again. I'm hoping to go back to Mexico this summer. When I am 15 [they'll be stoked.. 15 is HUGE! like i said in the paragraph above]. I hope to be able to go.. SO badly. I dont want to miss out too much on their lives. Everytime I talk to someone from Mexico they always tell me how much everyone misses me.. and it makes me miss them that much more. Especially because it is my friend Xuxa's birthday on the... 27th of october! And they are throwing her a HUGE party because it is her 15th birthday. Ohhh man!! I miss her like crazy! Mom says I can call Xuxa on her birthday though, because Xuxa and her famiy speak english, they used to live in the USA!

I was talking with Ray.. and I was telling him everything I miss about Mexico.. and I listed off a couple things... like the people... the places... the laughter... the smiles... the mexican meals!! And this is the picture he sent me right after I told him that. A picture of Liz.. Asael and Yari all eating!! Hahah! He's too funny. He says next time I come he will take me around Mexico, with Liz, and we will find places to eat reall mexican food. He says I will eat 'very richly' I'm uber stoked! That should be loads of fun.. another reason why I honestly can't wait to go there.. why should I wait? I want to go now! Seriously.. I miss them all like... SOOOOOOOOO much.. its unbelieveable. I can't remember the last time I talked with Lizbeth.. and I don't like that. I just sent her an email because I miss her so much. I'm hoping to get one back soon. I can't believe how much I've grown to love these people.. even after I've left! Crap! Sometimes it makes me so mad that i love them this much.. because its causing me pain! Because when I hear of their suffering I want to be there so bad!

Well I need to go.. Just thought I should update my blog.

By the way.. i did not write that last entry on monday august 27th.. i don't know why it says that..and I don't know how to change it.. I wrote that on like.. september 9th. haha.. so if you're feeling bad cuz you think you didn't notice it.. don't feel bad.. you didn't miss anything.

Anyways.. this week has totally sucked.. i'll probably write about it later. I am too tired to think about bad stuff right now. Hope you enjoyed the pictures :)

Te queiro mucho

Dios te bendiga mucho

Hatsa luego!

Con mucho amor:

senorita Shayna

Mexico. Video clips this time!

2007-08-27T12:03:00.000-07:00

Okay so this is Abi picking her nose. Haha, adorable eh? I miss her so much. Oh gosh, I can't believe it, it was her birthday on the 13th after we got back from mexico. And Yaris birthday was august 15th! sucks, i wish I could be there. I miss them SOOO much. like unbelieveably!

Then this is mom.. other wise known as super mom, on the plane to LA. We had the best stewartesses ever! They let mom demonstrate the seat belt and the breath mask thingers to the impact team. it was So freaaakin' hilarious. we just HAD to video tape it, and laugh hysterically.

I'm pretty stoked right now actually, i just talked with Paul, one of the organizers. and he said he'd send me a CD with all of the photos on it!! woo hoo! And I just sent in like.. 48 pictures to be devoloped!! Yaay!! Well, its only 48 out of like 200 but STILL! 48 is exciting! I'm so stoked to go to wal mart [hopefully tomorrow] and get my pictures!! Then I can finally make my scrap book pages, and show my friends.. AND I am send Liz, Asael and their family some pictures.. so i got doubles of some. mann i'm good. :)

I talked with Lizbeth the other day and shes back in school! Yaay! Shes going to bible school so that she can continue pastoring, and that was a big answer to prayer, because she didn't have the money for bible school and I asked around and got $600 [which is like.. 6100 pesos] for her! And now shes so happy and going to school, and theres extra money for the girls, and for food and clothes and stuff. I'm so happy for them.

Anyways, i should go, the main point for this blog was just for the videos. so feel free to watch.

This one is mostly just for the listening, as the video work is really bad. Abi just turned the camera on to record and then started walking and running, every once and a while she actually shows the people... and the church or something.. but listen really carefully, when shes showing the white bars you can hear her say "oooohhh my goodness" Its SO cute!! you have to listen for it. Ahh man Abi I miss you!! :)

Another picture or two

2007-08-09T01:51:00.000-07:00

Okay So I know its REALLY early in the morning, or REALLY late at night, whatever you wanna say...

but i just got off msn with one of the kids from mexico, and she sent me some more good pics! :)

yaay! more pictures!

So here are some more pictures for y'all =]

Me Danna and Risa! My gurlies!! I miss you so much! <3

My favourite family [but Danna and Yari aren't in this they were watchgin cartoons :P] Liz, Asael y Abi. Liz... Me casa es su casa.

Most of the team, missing a few.. like me and my mom! oh well.

Okay, HOLY COW! the girl in the black princess shirt, can SING! She has

a voice like an angel! And I love her so much! I'm so mad I didn't get a picture with her!!
Oh well... =] theres always next time =] =]

Enjoy :) :) <3

Mexico ...yes i know, again!

2007-08-05T15:46:00.001-07:00

Hola Amigas

Como estas?

I was just sitting here thinking about stuff, and I can't seem to get Mexico out of my head still. I try to get my mind off things, but EVERYTHING reminds me of all my little girls, especially Danna. Its really hard to forget, especially because I'm learning spanish, so its reminds me. Me and Danna had an inside joke everytime someone said 'uno momento' so now whenever I say it it almost makes me cry.

This is my Danna, everyone. Cutey ain't she? I miss her so much!! The day that we left, she almost never let me put her down! Which made it so much harder to say goodbye to her, cause it looked as if she was about to cry. I wouldn't be surprised, I was bawling my eyes out! Seriously, I would try to put her down because my arms would start to hurt and she would wrap her legs around me and not let go. not for the life of me! I couldn't get her off of me! She did NOT want to let go of me. Oh Danna, I miss you so much hunney! I mean, I know I am going to go back, and get to be with her and her family again. but its just such a hard wait. Plus by the time I see them all again... Danna will be huge! She will be like.. 8?! Maybe, I'm not exactly sure her exact age. but thats just crazy! I can't imagine my Danna being that big! Or her little sister Yari, she will be like.. 6! Oh dear. And her older sister Abi, will be like 12! Oh my gosh! Seriously though, Danna was like the little sister I never had, but I always wished I did. She was always with me. Always.. and now she is gone. Its really wierd, I don't know what to do without her. Everytime I see a picture of her I always expect to see her running around the corner and screaming my name. Or everytime I walk past a chair its like I can almost still feel her springing out of know where onto my back. Everything I do reminds me of her. I love the things she used to do. Oh when I walked away, I counted the steps I took. we are so far away from each other. I can't stand it. So many times I've almost packed a bag and walked out the door. But where would I go? I couldn't very well walk back to Mexico, now could I? I wish they could all see how much I need them right now. I miss them so much.

I feel like no one gets me. I'm trying not to speak about Mexico in my house because I know that no one wants to hear it. But sometimes its so hard... being so alone in a house with so many people in it. You have no idea. If I could, I would go on about Mexico 24/7 and never stop. But I can't. I always either get in trouble for talking to much, or for annoying everyone. Well "I'm sorry" is that what you want? Becuase if it is, I can say it. I may not mean it.. but I'll say it.

If only someone understood me right now. I need to be with someone who DOES understand. And someone who will encourage me, not tell me that its not going to happen, you know?

Man I have so many memories that I can't seem to get out of my head. Like the time I went shopping with Liz and Asael and Asael put a sombraro on my head and said "Shayna scream!" of course I did a little hoarse "ahhhh!" And he laughed so hard, Liz was just in the front shaking her head at her husband and quietly laughing to herself, and he said "Shayna is mexican!" I'll never forget that. I am fully mexican now says Asael. Haha, oh, I miss him. Just look at him! He is such an awesome guy! And its so hard to leave him behind. Him and his wife Liz. And of course their amazing daughters. I love them all so much. One of my favourite memories will always be just how much they loved me.. and took me in as part of their family. They asked me to go shopping with them, Asael and Liz even wanted me to come to Asael's moms house for breakfast so that she could meet me, becuase they wanted their mom to meet me so badly. That shows me how much they loved me. The last day we were in Mexico, They were giving me all sorts of presents, Asael even gave me his sunglasses! Becuase we, haha, we had an inside joke.. me Asael and Liz. They went and saw Casino Royale, you know... James bond? So he would, haha, he'd put the sunglasses on and say "Shayna, I am Bond... James bond" It was so funny,me and Liz just laughed and laughed at him, he thought he was so cool. he even went and bought Liz a Fish and named it James. Haha. What a cutie eh? I'll never forget everything that we did together. That would just be plain wrong. But I was SO disapointed, I cried myself to sleep! I got back to my hotel and realized that I didn't have Asael's sunglasses with me anymore!! I was so depressed. I still can't believe I don't know where they are. Am I that horrible of a person? That someone who has so little gives me one of their expensive possesions and I just lose it the NIGHT that he gave it to me? Ugh.

This is [from left to right] Asael [wearing his canada hat, mite i add] My mom, Liz [looking beautiful] and Sundra [our cook.. shes amazing!].

I remember sitting on the bus for 2 hours with Liz and she would just point to stuff and teach it to me in spanish. Like "burbuja" is bubble, its not pronounced at all the way it looks. Its said more like "Bull- boo - kccha" the last part is kinda like your hucking a looge. Yummy eh? I couldn't think of a better way of describing it. She taught me that at one of the clinics when she was painting my nails.

Painting my nails. Yes you heard me right, She like... French Manicured my nails! I was like oh yea baby! She is one of the most amazing woman I think I will ever meet. You have no idea. I wish for all of you to meet them, though I know it will probably not happen. Sad though, they are the most amazing little family. When I go back, I [and i will be going back] I will bring you more pictures. sound good?

Another memory that I will never forget is that My "Abbotsford School of Intergrated Arts" bracelet is in mexico! not kidding, its with Danna. Look I have proof.

Look at the white band on my wrist. That would be my bracelet.
now look at Danna's wrist. she is in Tod's arms, she is wearing my bracelet. Haha cutie.

Anyways. I don't wanna bore y'all to death with my sad stories. I just can't seem to stop thinking about it. And I'm so SICK of having to fake a smile and tell people that i'm fine, when i'm obviously not. No its not just Mexico, its a million things trying to cram itself into one thought, but its not working out. I am trying to hold it all in, but then when someone that I trust finally asks me how i'm doing, i just EXPLODE with all my crap, for lack of a better word. And it sucks! Because then I feel so stupid for dumping all that crap on them that they didn't need. But where else is it supposed to go? I tried to keep it inside, but that just doesn't work, as evident by many times exploding.

I had a little bit of a leakage going on. I didn't explode today, but this morning... wwhoooo eeeee was I ever cranky. I just can't handle it sometimes. its a little too much for me. And it seems like I have to find a way, becuase no one really cares anyways. ya know?

Anyways. here are some pics to feast y'alls eyes on.

This is Me and Yari. Liz and Asael's Daughter

These are two cuties in Coushkiwi.

This is Risa. [Rice-a] She is from Entabledaro.

And this is all my Entabledaro Kids. MISS YOU!

These are my coushkiwi chickas. Faces painted and everything! Haha
Dancing in La Uno. Second Last Day

I am dancing with Yari, Betty with Danna.

Yes i'm aware, i look like a doof. but Yari is CUTE!!

Playing with the left over glasses.

Danna just being Danna.

Kate and I in Coushkiwi. One of my favourite nurses.
Yari. Adorable!! I miss 'er!

Pyramids. Mayan Pyramids, now would be the time to say ""oooooo! Ahhhh" Fantasic photography Shayna! Haha.

Abi, Danna, Anna, Risa, my FAVOURITE girlies.

I know its blurred, but its me and Solie, and its cute!

Cactus Boo, Betty and I found on the way to Entabledaro.

Sisterly Love. ♥

Mexico City from the Sky, Smoggy eh?

Our freakkin' awesome pink bus. Darn straight, used it almost everyday.

Dancing with the kiddies. Entabledaro ♥

Mexico.. again.

2007-07-12T20:05:00.000-07:00

I'm so sick of everyone saying me being 'homesick' for mexico is "normal". That everyone feels it, but eventually grows out of it. What if I dont wanna grow out of it? What if I wanna stay missing mexico..? More ways for me to remember that I am going to live there. I already know I am. Its been planned, like I've said a whole bunch of times before. Everyone knows it, so stop telling me any different! You can think what you want.. and say what you feel, but don't try to crush my dreams. Hell, even if i'm not going to live there later like I want to.. whats the harm in just letting me dream? And dream on I shall.. I miss Mexico so much. I want to be there with my 2nd family RIGHT now. I wish I was.. I hate Abbotsford now.. I hate this place.. I miss my home in mexico. But dont worry people of entabledaro... I wont be gone too long, because I can't truly be at home until I am where my heart is.. and My heart is with the people of entabledaro. Theres nothing anyone can do about that.. so I'm sorry, but please stop trying. Your telling me that I am going to forget Mexico. Well not technically forget Mexico, but forget my passion to go there. Sorry, but that isn't going to happen. I am in LOVE with Mexico.. and no one can tell me otherwise. There are only two people in this world who believe me.. and one lives in the US, in two years will live in Mexico, and one live in Abbotsford like me, but come september and shes in mexico also.

All of y'all have no idea. I can quite honestly say that I feel God is CALLING me to Mexico.. can't you get that? C-A-L-L-I-N-G M-E! Me.. no one else! So why does everyone feel the need to put in their little tidbit about everything! I'm tired of it! I just want someone in THIS country to support me in my desicions. I don't give a flying horses arrrsee what you think about it. Just help me through this.. be a shoulder to lean on, and don't try the whole "Well I told you before, everyone goes thru this on their first missions trip" Or the person who says "You will grow out of it sweetie!" Or even the person who says "Well, my daughter moved to (someplace) and her and her husband are still trying to get the bugs out!" I don't need someone to tell me what other people have gone thru. I dont need someone to someone to tell me what I will and will not do. And I dont need someone to tell me what people in their life are doing. I am only thinking about what I will be doing in tres años, and what I am doing now to help me reach that goal. I dont really care what anyone says. I am only listening to God. And sure, you can not believe me, I dont really care.. I am only listening to God, like I said before. And hey, what a coincidence.. I really wanna do this to.

Seriously.. All I need is someone who will just support me! Please! That is all I'm asking, you dont need to pay for my ticket to mexico, drop me off at the airport and buy me a house! All you have to do is be there when I need someone to talk to, or if I'm sad.. don't tell me to stop talking.. let me vent, I need it. And one last thing. Don't try to compare my feelings with other peoples feelings that they may have had. Don't try to understand, because if you couldn't see why I wanted to be there right now from my stories, then you wont find out later.. so trying to understand when you really aren't is not helping anyone. If you want to understand.. LISTEN. just.. listen. Ask questions.. talk to me.. but don't think you know everything already.

Anyways. Thats my little rant. Sorry if this sounds really whiny. I dont mean it to be.. I'm just upset, and with the person I now mostly talk to in Kamloops.. There really is no one but people on msn, and thats just not the same. I could call the girl in Kamloops, but I dont wanna interupt her time with her mom, brother and neice, so why bother? I mean, she should be home.. at the end of the week? Hopefully anyways. Then she might be comming over :) Yaaay.

I'll go now. Leaving on that happy note!

Adios. Dios te bendiga.

Con amor, De: Shayna

Home again

2007-07-09T12:51:00.001-07:00

Hey y'all I'm home. But I dont wanna be. I mite be getting homeschooled bext year so i can finish school faster and go live in entabledaro, its in veracruz mexico. I met the most amazing people there. The pastor and his wife for one. They are both the pastors of the church in entabledaro. And their kids!! Oh jeez, I miss them all so much already. When I said goodbye the first time, I cried so hard. Then they surprised us by comming up to La Uno (the place we went after 5 days in entabledaro) and I got even closer to them, and so it was even harder to say good bye. I cried ten times harder becuase I know, If i dont work my butt off to save up money to go see them, it wont happen. And I want it to happen so badly.

I didn't speak their language [only a couple words], and they didn't speak mine [only a couple words too, we were both learning each others language], but we connected so easily! I'm going to learn spanish, so I can call Liz, I have every possible way of contact with them, without actually being with them. I have Liz's cell number, I have Liz's email, and Asa's, and I have Liz and Asa's adress for mail. I'm going to use an online translator to translate for me until I speak spanish tho.

Lizbeth, and Asaeal [the pastors], told me that "me casa, su casa" Their house is my house. They didn't want me to leave. They said that if I come to live in Entabledaro, I can live with them. And they want me to come for visits all the time, And stay with them. I would love to! I miss them all already.Liz gave me like... 10 hugs the night we were saying goodbye, becuase one of us would suck it up and stop crying, but then we'd see the other bawling, and it would make us cry all over again. It was really sad! If Asa found one of us crying, he would bring us over to the other one, and make us hug again. I never wanted to let go. She was like.. a second mother to me.. A best friend, An older sister. And they were all giving me gifts and stuff. Liz and Asa bought me a shirt, I told them not to, but they said it would help me to remember them. How could I say no to that?

The kids were the second hardest to say goodbye to. Abi, 6, Danna, 5, and Jarib (dont pronouce the b) 3. Danna was like clinging to me and not letting go, she didn't want us to leave. She wouldn't even let me put her down. I would go to put her down, and she would wrap her legs even tighter. I cried so hard saying goodbye to her.

Asa had already explained to the kids before hand what was going on, so they already knew. And they didn't seem to like it. Abby kept comming and standing in front of me when i didn't have Danna, and she would just lean into me, and give me these huge hugs. Or when I was sitting down, she would just run and jump onto my lap. I miss her so much. It was so hard to say goodbye to all her too. I cried so hard.

Jarib was already sleeping in the car, so I didn't get to say goodbye to her.. But I cried for her all the same. I miss everysingle one of them. and not being able to say goodbye to Jarib was the worst feeling ever.

Anyways, that was just what I was thinking about right now. I miss Entabledaro, and I AM going back there. Some time. I know this entry makes me sound like a wuss, but i dont really give a flying horses arsssee. I loved these people with all my heart, and I never wanted to leave them. Which is why I am moving up there and living with them. Its already been planned between me, Asa and Liz.

congrats

2007-06-14T15:39:00.000-07:00

CONGRATULATIONS MAJEWSKIS TEAM! TEAM FOURTEEN KICKED SOME MAJOR TAIL! TURDSTERS ALL THE WAY.

Anyways, that was just for my team. We had sports day today and my team got in thirs out of fourteen teams! It was so awesome, we played 5 baseball games, 1 fort knoxx game and one round of the obstacle course. We have.. 21 points in total at the end.My team was the greatest ever! I am so proud of us all! It was a mix between each grade [ 6-9 ] and now i really know a lot of the younger kids, and the older [ but i already know the older kids because either A. i just do, and sometimes we talk,or B.They are in my dance class at school. ] So yeah. we got third place!!

My Surprise Party!

2007-05-20T17:35:00.000-07:00

Heyy y'all.

So my birthday was on May 9th. And guess what? My bestest friend in the universe (Rebekah Naomi) threw me a surprise party yesterday [saturday May 19th/07]! I felt like the specialist gurlie that there ever was! She is my most amazing friend ever, and I'm not sure what I'd ever do without her!

So at my party was my bestest friend Becky, of course, and my other three amazing friends from youth. Sarah, Crystal, and Jessica. And then some of my most amazing youth leaders, though three of them couldn't come [Doogie, Anj, and Steve] we had fun anyways. The youth leaders were.. Becky[differentone. BeckyToews], Jenny, Phil, Behn, Mandy, Kevin, and Alexa. We had so much fricken fun playing Cranium and then making the losing team go outside in the pouring rain and hug a tree for a minute in bare feet. It was amazing!

I got alot of amazing presents but i try not too much to dwell on that.. i wouldn't care if NONE of them got me ANYTHING. it just rules that they all came just for me. and they worked SO hard in making this all work out for me. It turns out they wanted to do it last saturday. Becky D. told my that BeckyT and Phil [husbandandwifee] wanted me to babysit that night. but they hadn't called me the night before so i just went with my mom to a conference in Surrey which lasted all day. BeckyD was SO mad at me.. and i couldn't figure out why. I was like. Geez Becky, it was only a babysitting job. i'm sorry! I'll do it next time !But no.. it was an amazing day.. i've never had a surprise party before and it just proved to me how much they all love me, and it meant so much to me. I can't believe any of my friends would do something so amazing for me.

Becky you are my BFFFE [Best friend for freaking ever] and I hope I never lose you. You are such a great friend, and you help me out So much, its unbelievable.
I'll try to just call and ask if she can drive me somewhere [which btw she RARELY EVER tells me no] and we end up talking for like.. half an hour. Seriously, she is my most amazing friend ever. and I love her so much.

BECKY NAOMI DOMINGO.. YOU ARE THE MOST AMAZING PERSON. AND I KNOW YOU ASK ME TIME IN AND TIME OUT WHY I AM FRIENDS WITH YOU.. BUT THIS IS EXACTLY WHY. YOU ARE AMAZING BEYOND BELIF AND I DON'T THINK I WILL EVER FIND ANOTHER FRIEND LIKE YOU. I HOPE WE NEVER LOSE TOUCH WITH EACH OTHER BECASUE OUR FRIENDSHIP, I KNOW, WILL LAST OUR WHOLE LIVES. YOU ARE SO FILLED WITH GOD, AND YOU CARE SO MUCH ABOUT ME.. EVEN WHEN ALL I TALK ABOUT IS HOW MUCH EVERYONE HATES ME. YOU TOTALLY JUST PROVED TO ME THAT I'VE BEEN WRONG THIS WHOLE TIME. YOU ARE AMAZING.. TO FREAKING AMAZING TO PUT INTO WORDS. I THINK I'VE REPEATED EVERYTHING I'VE SAID AT LEAT THREE TIMES NOW, BUT THATS OKAY. I'M JUST MAKING SURE YOU CATCH MY DRIFT. WHEN WE GROW UP, GET OLD, MARRIED, AND HAVE KIDS.. YOUR DEFINITELY GOING TO BE MY KIDDIES AUNTY. BECAUASE YOU ARE FREAKING AMAZING. REBEKAH. I'M RUNNING OUT OF THINGS TO SAY WITHOUT REPEATING ANYTHING A FOURTH TIME, SO I'LL END WITH THIS. I LOVE YOU.

Micah, Shayna, Jess

2007-04-24T20:21:00.001-07:00

Hello faithful few that read my blog. Today was an awesome day. I go to a fine arts school so for math, we were learnign about polygons, My teacher, Mrs. Kesslar, took us downstairs into the foyer and told us to get into a group of three and make an equilateral triangle! Haha! And then we got into a group of four and made a square.. then five and a pentagon, and six.. a hexagon.. and so on and so on.

Then my daddy pulls up and it turns out that BEN was in the car.. which meant, MICAH WAS AT MY HOUSEEE!! Yaaaay! So Jessica came over and we took care of Micah. This is the most adorable little baby ever. I love him to pieces... :)

Plus, my mom is going into the passport office this week - she's going to stand in line for ME - so I can have my passport and go to Mexico. YEAH! I am going with my mom, and Impact Nations, to Mexico June 25 - July 6th. Mom has been praying about taking me on a missions trip and really felt God tell her THIS was the one. I'm alittle nervous, but excited too. Mom says I'll be working with orphans, and also helping pray for people in the medical clinic. Plus,I think she's planning on me being a part of her prayer ministry team, during the outdoor meetings.

Anyways...today was an awesome day!

Oh..and yesterday was pretty awesome too! Guess what?!!! I found out that I WON the singing Scholarship! ( Our school went to a choral competition in Pr. George last week, and I applied for a scholarship, that was going to be awarded after all the judges judged the choirs.) Anyways...I found out yesterday at school, I WON!! I'm so excited! I love singing. I wonder if God is going to use my singing for something. That would be cool - but I can't imagine what.

So..yeah..yesterday was a good day too!

Yeah okay, and those last two paragraphs... my mom wrote, lol. I must've left my blog open. Silly Supermom .. writing stuff for me. LoL

Anyways.. this is the REAL Shayna.. Signing off! Bye bye. Love you :)

Speech finals

2007-03-30T18:04:00.001-07:00

So I got into the speech finals (In front of the school). And guess what? I won first place!!! I am so excited. The finals were on Wednesday March the 28th and the speech districts that my school is sending me too are on Thursday April the 12th.

I'm pretty stoked!

I changed my speech a bit since i posted it on here. I heard a couple people started crying when I was reading my speech. and the digital arts teacher made a DVD of it, so I can keep it and remember that I won! Its the first time I've ever won the speeches, usually I get 3rd or 2nd.

So anyways, I though I should just post to inform you!
talk to you all later!

Love:
☼♫Shayna ♫☼

Speech

2007-03-24T13:40:00.000-07:00

okay, so for school I was supposed to write a speech. And so here it is.

Its not really G rated tho, so... be careful with 'little-er' ones reading it, may scare them.

Its about Animal Testing. Tell me what you think, I'm handing it in on monday.

Testing, Testing 1…2… wait, this is tested on what?!

Chair Person,
Honourable Judges
Ladies and Gentlemen
Fellow Students

Today I will be talking about animal testing, and what can be done to stop it. I believe that animal testing is wrong. Even a friendly pet food chain is testing on animals. There are alternatives to animal testing that has the same, or even more, accuracy.

PETA (People for Ethical Treatment of Animals) went to investigate the contract laboratory of ‘Iams’ for about 10 months before reporting back. PETA had said in their actual report that the investigator found dogs who had gone crazy from intense confinement in barren steel cages and cement cells, dogs who had been left on a dirty floor with muscle hacked from their thighs, and horribly sick dogs and cats who were languishing in their cages, neglected and left to suffer alone without veterinary care.
Iams claims that what they do makes a ‘better product’ for consumers.

There are many different types of animal testing, though today I will only be mentioning two. One type of testing is an LD50 test. In this infamous test, animals are force-fed doses of chemicals until they die. The tests inflict hideous suffering on the animals, who endure severe abdominal pain; bleeding from the nose, mouth, and other areas; convulsions; seizures; diarrhea; and paralysis before they die.
Another test, is the “Fish Acute Toxicity Tests” These tests are similar to the LD50 test, except that chemicals are pumped into the water tanks that hold fish until the animals die. The fish endure severe pain, before they are poisoned to death.

Doesn’t sound very appealing does it? And there are still more types of testing! More horrible ways that animal can slowly suffer for our drugs and “beauty”. For example:

Hair spray and bleach is sprayed into rabbit’s eyes and their throats.
Experimental drugs are pumped into monkey’s stomachs thru tubes shoved far into their nose or throat. And most of these experimental animals die from various abuses, and are denied veterinary care.

People take innocent animals and put them through unimaginable pain until they eventually die, all in the name of “Science”. But Mice are not little men, The results of a drug may not have the same effect on a human then it had on a mouse. Therefore the results would be inaccurate.
But there is an alternative to these horrendous tests. Scientists can take human blood and tissue to test the drugs and products on. It is said to have more accuracy then animal testing and this way, no one is hurt.
Animals do not have to be put through so much pain for us. Please, you can help stop animal-testing, all you need to do is not support it. Check the product to make sure that it says it is not tested on animals before you buy. And think about it... do we really need another hair spray?

Thank you.

A Warriors Cry

2007-03-19T12:33:00.000-07:00

A Warriors Cry

He looks
over the mountainside
He shall wait.
His heart is true,
His soul is pure
What’s that?
He ducks behind a bush,
Waiting,
For the right time to move
He sees them all
Sneaking slowly
Up the mountain
He’s not afraid
‘Bring it on’
He thinks to himself
Just as all of them reach the base of the mountain
He steps out
From his hiding place
A sword in each hand
He stands
The sun behind him
Creating a silhouette
for all below to see.
They all look up
And begin to rush
The climbing
But, still he stands
Stands ground
He is not afraid
For his Father is watching
Watching and protecting.
Sending more
To help with his aid
Something flashes across the sky
They are coming
He grins
And lets out
A soft chuckle
“If only they knew”
His friends begin
To land softly behind him. Staring down
At the coming danger
But they are still
not afraid
He looks back
On all his friends,
He gives them a nod
And a little wink,
He once again faces
The demons climbing
The mountainside
Casually, he raises his sword
High up into the sky
And lets out
A Warrior Cry
High above the mountains
It carries
A warning for all near and far
That this is the end
Get ready for war
A warrior cry is loud and long
Crying out, loud
like a brilliant song
All his friends join in
Crying together
Over the mountainside
And up into the heavens
Praying for the Lord’s protection
Swords raised high
They all together
rush down the mountain
Going into war
Still you can hear
The Warriors Cry
Ringing loud a clear
Like a brilliant song
While all below
Is Havoc
Gruesome Battle
Down below
Teaching the Demons
Where they should go
Don’t come up here
And cause people to
Go Astray
Stay down below
Where you belong
God reigns on high
Not the father of lies
Get back where you belong
And Suddenly they all began
To Flee
The Warriors Cry Has worked before
But not as well as it has
Today
God has protected us all.
The Battle scene is clean
The enemy has gone
They are no where to be seen
He faces his friends once more
And slowly
He raises his sword
And lets out a warrior cry
Joined by the sound
Of hundreds of his friends
Joining in the cry

And now hundreds of
warrior Angels
Fly through the sky
Watching us
Making sure we’re safe
Making sure demons don’t try
Because God loves you
And he wants to make sure
You’re always safe
And if you ever hear
A soft song being sung in your ear
You’re hearing the cry
Of A Warrior Angel
In Battle
Or Victory.

By: Shayna Marie Dyck

Poems again.

2007-03-16T22:43:00.001-07:00

Okay so as many of you already know, when I get bored I write poems and songs! So here's a one I've finished recently. My best friend and I got in a little misunderstanding, so [unplanned] we both ended up writing poems for each other. So here's mine, and hers is underneath.

8:56pm
I remember the day we met
It was a hilarious day
A day I will not soon forget

Mandy found you
And introduced us
Then came in Phil
He made such a big fuss

He told us to be good
He told us to be kind
He said I was now your best friend
And you were now mine.

Pushing us together
What an awkward time that was
We didn’t even know each other
Every single Youth night
There we were
You and I
Hanging out together

You really had become my
best friend
Just as Pastor Phil had
Said

One day I brought some friends
To youth with me
I had no Idea what how they would act
What the after effect would be

They ended up ignoring
You
I wasn’t sure how to react
I kept trying to bring you in too
But it didn’t work

I was stupid and stuck with them
Even tho my true best friend was not with me
I felt so horrible when I got home
I thot we would never be the same good friends
We used to be

Weep ‘till the sea is full
I will not
I will stay strong
Dry as the dessert
When prying eyes look away
Only then, will I flood the world with my
Grief, Sorrow, Sadness

The next day you called me,
Omg, I was so happy!
You began to say sorry
And I said
“Wait, why should you be?”

We talked it out,
now were goodWe’re the very best friends
Just as Phil said we should
<3

[I wrote two.. this is the second one]

Friendship growing like a flower
Friends forever within the hour

Memories we will forever save
secrets we will take to the grave

But then a fight,only once
never twice

She fely very hurt
I got very sad
I didn't mean
To make her feel bad

Laying in my bed
Wallowing in self pity
waiting for someone to ask what was wrong
Needed someone to feel sorry for me

Weep 'till the sea is full
I will not
I will stay dry
Dry as the desert
Only when the prying eyes look away
will I flood the earth with my
Grief, Sorrow, Sadness.

I felt so bad
I didn't know what to do
so I looked up to the sky
and with my Father
I talked it thru.

We talked thru what should be done
I almost picked up the phone
when suddenly it rung

we talked things thru
we were both wrong and right
And in that one phone call
we figured it all out that night

[The one my friend wrote \/]
7:42pm:

I’m not going to jump to conclusions
With everything going on right now
Im losing my grip
The walls are caving in
Feel like im gonna slip

I gotta pick up the phone
And dial the number
Did I do something wrong?
I’m trying to remember

Being ditched
Feeling left out
Hung out with some other friends
But we had nothing to talk about

This friendship just started to bloom
I’m gonna end this pity party
Right here in my room
Stop feeling sorry for myself
And give her a chance
Stop acting like a 5 year old
And put on my big girl pants

So I picked up the phone
And dialed the number…

Whispering willows
Dancing in the breeze
Do they feelings?
Or are they just trees?

Rain falls down
Storm breaks it apart
Is it totally worthless?
Or still a work of art?

Forgiveness entered through the clouds
The rain began to stop
The sky a shade or sparkling blue
And there forgiveness shone through
Hope for someone to be there
Hope for someone to understand
Solid rock formed beneath my feet
Finally I could stand

Done with carrying all this weight
I gave my garbage to him
The only one to satisfy my sorrow, ache, or whim

Forgiveness stayed there in the clouds
The rain had stopped for good
Lifted my face up to the sky
Took off my hood
Someone was there
Someone understood
Friends for life
We looked up to the sky
And firmly we stood

So there you go... poems! yaay. Maybe later I'll put on more that I've written byes : ]

How do u say goodbye?

2007-02-03T18:36:00.000-08:00

Today I had to clean the bathroom, its my Saturday chore. I was listening to my moms ipod, and this song comes on "Tonight" by FM static. ( I highly recommend it! ) it goes like this.

I remember the times we spent together
All those drives, we had a million questions
All about our lives
And when we got to New York everything felt right
I wish you were here with me,
Tonight

I remember the days we spent together,
were not enough, it used to feel like dreaming
Except we always woke up,
Never thought not having you here now
Would hurt so much

Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up
I need your loving hands to come and pick me up
And every night I miss you
I can just look up
And know the stars are Holding you, holding you, holding you
Tonight

I remember the time you told me
About when you were eight
And all those things you said that night
That just couldn't waitI remember the car you were last seen in
And the games we would play
All the times we spilled our coffees
And stayed out way too late
I remember the time you sat and told me
About your Jesus, and how not to look back
Even if no one believes usWhen it hurts so bad, sometimes
Not having you here

Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up
I need your loving hands to come and pick me up
And every night I miss you
I can just look up
And know the stars are Holding you, holding you, holding you
Tonight

I say
Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up
I need your loving hands to come and pick me up
And every night I miss you
I can just look up
And know the stars are Holding you, holding you, holding you
Tonight

This song really hit home. When I was six my best friend, my cousin Lisa, died. She was an adult. and she got married to a guy named Chris. I was only 6. For so long I didn't understand, I thought she was going to come back, I was too young to figure it out. Her wedding was on the day of my fifth birthday. I felt like the specialist little kid in the world.I remember ,tho, I was her flower girl. I remember walking down the Isle and suddenly at the end of it, I stopped. I burst into tears and ran to my Daddy. I sat in his lap bawling. I didn't want her to get married.. becuz I thot if she did... I would never be able to see her again. I was rite. Rite after the marriage (pratically) Lisa and Chris moved to Ontario. Everything was fine until she got into a car accident after dropping her husband off at work. Someone ran a red light and smashed into the driver side of her car. She was 5 months pregnant. But before all that, She gave me a book, "The Veleteen Rabbit", that said in it something like "To my Dear Shayna. Thank you for sharing your most special day with Chris and I" And it went on like that. I still have it. I still cant believe shes gone and its been 7 years. I wish I just would've gotten more time to be with her, even just an hour. I miss her so much. How do you say goodbye to someone so dear to you? She was like my hero...

Back to my question tho. How would you say good bye? I've tried, time in and time out. I know shes in heaven now.. and that shes in a good place, but it still hurts. No Matter what happens im always going to miss her. She was like my best friend, I loved her so much. I couldn't believe that the feelings and thought that were going thru my head during her wedding, were actually true. Its crazy that after all these years i just realized that my fears were true that one day 8 years ago. How do you just let go? How do you say goodbye when its family?

I just wish I could have one more minute with her. One more time. Just once. I love her so much. Sometimes I just wish she was here to give me one of her amazing hugs when im sad.
"Tonight I've Fallen and I cant get up. I need your loving hands to come and pick me up. And everynight I miss you, I can just look up and know the stars are holding you, holding you, holding you... tonight."

<3lisa I love you

School..

2007-01-30T18:51:00.000-08:00

So I go to a Fine Arts School way up on the mountain. I really wanna graduate from the arts school.. but my parents are making me leave next year! I dont wanna. I'd rather walk home lol. ANYWAYS

So it used to be that we {the students} would just do all four rotations {Dance, Drama, Music, Visual Arts} but now becuz the grade nines get to choose the grade 8s are getting to choose, but only for this year.. not next. I handed my choice form {we hada fill out this form about what we wanted and have a parent/guardian sign it} So its the first day of choice rotations and Mrs. Kesslar is telling us our rotations. My names not called.....? Im like.. "Uhhh Mrs. Kesslar, you didn't call me" Shes like.. "then you didn't hand in ur choices form" im llike.. "I gave it to Mrs. Majewski like... last week!" but long story short. Mrs. Majewski never gave it to Mrs. Kesslar.. so it was like.. a 'Shaynas so horrible cuz she didn't hand in her form' day. Which sucked. Kesslar wasn't very happy with me. I was like.. comeon, not my fault! But oh well.

Anyways. I got the choices I wanted! With all the people I wanted too! So... Im in Choral Music {Singing.. YES!} for block A and Dance for Block B. I was so happy! Yaaaaaay! I wanted to scream! So Im with like.. Jess, and Brook, and Krsytal. And me and Krystal are going for like every single solo there is. if we have to.. we'll make is a duo.. or she sings a line, I sing a line, ya know? Its gonna be soo fun! And for dance.. Im with:
1. Tanya
2. Brook
3.Maggie
4. Jessica
5. Rebecca
6. Anny
And I think Kiera. Its pretty sweet. at least im not the ONLY not-so-uber-flexible person there. It makes it better, cuz then im not so much an outcast.. lol.

Im not exactly shure what else to type up here. Any Ideas? im running low.....

Signed with Love
<3Shayna Marie-

New Years!

2007-01-02T16:07:00.000-08:00

5....4.....3....2....1!!! HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Hello everyone, welcome to my FIRST post. Of the new year of course! happy new year everyone! How was your new years eve? what did you do? I went to my friend Maggie house and we stayed up ALL night watching movies, but keeping a close eye on the time, we didn't want to miss the count down. We didn't :) We counted down with the rest of the world, and while we were counting, we called our friend Jill and left her a lovely message on her answering machine of us counting down. Yaay, im shure she was glad to hear us scream into our phone. lol! We took loads of pictures. I'll never forget that night with Maggie, we were meant to be best friends, lol we even finish each others sentances sometimes. Then when I went home, we (my family) did our annual Movie Marathon, or our Moviethon. and I stayed up ALL night then too.. i Finally went to bed around 1 am. but not before calculating that i had been awake for over 37 hours! CRAZY I KNOW! 37.. wow I think thats my new record.. at least untill next year :)
Tell me how yours was.. what did you all do?
Good bye! and Happy New Years!

<3Shayna

Merry Christmas!

2006-12-26T13:48:00.000-08:00

**jingle, jingle jingle** Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas!
So how did everyones Christmas go? Mine was just fantabulos! See.. when people hear that I had 12 presents under the tree everyones jaw just dropped. but people dont get that my family doesn't get each other Ipod Nanos and... Computers... and.... BIG presents. My family gets us presents that we can use.. That'll last us a long time. Such as.. a storage conpartment.. (a froggy one :P) Slippers.. Socks. That sorta thing. I didn't get much uber fun stuff, like that big presents mentioned above. But I dont care.. Christmas isn't about the presents.. it never was... they are just an added bonus.

Christmas time isn't a time to be greedy and to be mean. Its a time to remember Jesus. He was born on this day.. wasn't he? Well.. maybe not on this exact day, but.. this was the day chosen to remember his birth. "Happy Birthday baby Jesus" thats an awesome song "All year long we'll remember, that Precious gift we get from youuu"

Did you know December 25th used to be a Muslim holiday? Christains took over a long long lonnngg time ago, and renamed it Christmas. Bet 'cha didn't know that.
Did you know that... The abbreviation of Xmas for Christmas is not irreligious.
The first letter of the word Christ in Greek is chi, which is identical to our X. Xmas was originally an ecclesiastical abbreviation that was used in tables and charts. In the early days of printing, when font sizes were limited and type was set by hand, abbreviations and ditto marks were used liberally. Xmas came into general use from the church!

Theres so much about Christmas I bet people failed to know becuz a lot of people are SO obsessed in getting there presents, they are forgetting what Christmas is all about. JESUS!

I got a lot this year.. shure. But thats not what christmas is about. Its about remebering Jesus' birth, and celebrating! So celebrate People of God! CELEBRATE! And always remember, the true meaning of christmas.

Theres my rambling for the day..
Love you all
and hope your christmas was full of jesus and family fun
<3shayna

Today... Wow... today....

2006-12-08T15:05:00.000-08:00

Today was HORRIBLE! Totally horrid! So much happened today.. and not good stuff... no.. not good AT all.

#1. Isaac tripped Shauna in P.E today, she hit her head really hard on the gym floor. She then started SCREAMING like someone was killing her! We all thot she was kidding,becuz she usually jokes around and screams and stuff, so we kept on playing basketball.. and then someone tried to make her get up.. and she wouldn't stop screaming!! So someone finally grabbed her picked her up and stood her upright. And then she stopped. But then she didn't know what was going on... she couldn't remember falling.. she couldn't remember screaming, and now Shauna is the kinda girl that even by a look she bursts out laughing, she cant look at anyone without smiling. And she was NOT smiling. she was crying, she was sooo scared that she couldn't remember! When the gym teacher asked her her birthday.. she said it was May 93rd 2006. first off... 93rd?! tahts not even a day in may.. second.. 2006? that would have meant she wasn't even a year old. Yeah.. something was deffinitly wrong. Our math class is on the top floor.. and we were going from math to French which is one floor down, and when we walked down the stairs... she couldn't remember it.. at the bottom step she was like.. WOAH, how did i get here? im like.. Shauna.. you walked... down the stairs! shes like.. no..... i was JUST in math.. and now suddently im down here. We were like.. uhhh Shauna!! No, we just walked downstairs! It was soo scary. I hope God REALLY watches her tonite. A lot more happened with her, but it'd take way to long to write out.
Someone really scared her tho.. someone told her she had to stay with us ( A student told her, not a teacher) Or else she'd fall asleep and die. And we all SMACKED the kid that said it.. and Shauna burst into tears, of course.. she doesn't want to die! And your not supposed to tell someone that.

#2. My friends puppy is dying! Of Hypothermia!!! isn't that saddd?? She (Layla, a little golden retreiever.. i think not even 2 months old) was wondering around outside, and she walked onto the pool.. which is frozen over with ice due to this freaky weather we were having, and the ice broke from under her and she fell in! :( Isn't that horrible! The poor puppy!! And so now shes dying, and there trying to keep her as warm as possible. Her brother is So sad now, becuz its his dog. But yeahh.. its really sad

A lot more happened at school.. but once again.. to much to write out. I gotta go.. i have like.. A MILLION projects to finish before Dec.22... it sux... a lot. Byes!!

Love you all; Mwahh<3
<3Shayna

Tyra Banks

2006-11-23T17:23:00.000-08:00

Okay so this post is so totally dedicated to Tyra, becuz I love her. Not only can she model, she she can SING too!! She only ever did one song tho, but its totally her.. and its totally awesome. You can tell its her.. cuz it sounds like her. Shes so beautiful!!!!! Its freaking crazy! She also helps out people alot. Tomorrow on Tyra ( Friday at 4 on Channel 9 or 11 ) She is doing something called 'Beauty 101' And shes sitting at a phone and answering (LIVE) peoples questions.. and helping them out. Then she really helps out this lady who has size 16 feet! It didn't show what it was, but me and Maggie(my friend) guess that it is a closet full of all different kinds of shoes, cuz lets face it.. if you are a woman and you have size 16 feet.. ther aren't going to be very nice dress shoes out there for you. ( Not trying to be mean or anything )

Did you know Tyra also got a 'makeover' to be a homeless person, and hung out with a homeless person on the streets to see what it was like? Yup, its true! Could you imagine? Willingly becomming homeless for a day or so? That would totally change your prospective on everything! She must have been truly determined to do this. I dont think I could ever last that long without food!! As selfish as that may sound, its totally true!!

Once she had drug addicts on her show. Old Drug addicts.. like they weren't addicted any more. She took woman who were all scared on there faces from doing drugs and gave them a total makeover, and got rid (almost) of all the scars from the drugs!! It was sooo cool!

I cant wait to watch her next show.. today at 4!!! :D
Byes! Love you all

Mwahh

Rawr!

2006-11-10T23:12:00.000-08:00

Rawr!! im so freaaakkkinnnn' confused right now. Sometimes things are just so screwed up. Now is one of those down times, I hate this! I just... i get so confused.. and so caught up in everything, that I dont know what to do. For instance.. All my friends say they're there for me.. but it feels like im alone, no matter what. They are always making plans without me.. not that that usually bugs me.. but then they talk about how much fun it'll be without me.. while im there. thats what annoys me. Of course.. I get up and walk away so they wont notice the tears. I dont think they realize how much it hurts, they're so used to being accepted right away.. not realizing that theres me.. who does't get accepted so easily. They dont realize that not all of us can be as... hmmmmm. I cant think of the word. I know God is with me always, but it still hurts to have all my friends doing this to me. I will talk to them.. I have talked to them.. nothing seems to be working. I love my friends so much and I really dont wanna be losing them right now!

There are some people that have helped me a lot tho.
Mrs.Lainchbury for one. She was the sweetest teacher I ever had. Altho 5 years ago.. I still sometimes come to her when I need someone to talk to. She is the most kind and compassionate person I know, She makes time for you no matter what.. no matter how busy she is.. she'll work while you talk, and it really helps... I just wish I could see her more often, and do more in return for her...She is the kind of teacher that you wish every teacher could just be like. I'll never forget you.. you've helped me so much<3 I love you, and Miss you terribly<3
Mrs.Majewski is one of the best teachers ever. She ALWAYS listens and ALWAYS makes time for you, no matter how busy her schedule is. She is the kind of teacher you wish for on your first day of school. She never makes you feel stupid for anything you say.. even if what you said was completely retarded. And believe me.. if you know me.. you'd know half the stuff I say is completely retarded. Shes the kinda of teacher you'll never forget. I love you<3 I'm so glad to have you as my teacher for the second time<33
Miss Dussin was my teacher last year, now she teaches at a different school.. and I miss her soo much! :( Shes the kind of teacher that made you love coming to school in the morning. She ( along with the two mentioned above) is one of the main reasons why I didn't actually mind that much, getting out of bed in the morning for school. She always let me talk to her after school. And even if she wasn't there for the day (T.O.C) She'd leave us a note somewhere.. telling us how much she'd miss us.. and reminding us to be good. We even thought to throw her a suprise party. I love you and miss you soo much <3 I wish you didn't have to leave us so soon
These are a few of the people that helped me the most during all the hard times I had. Only one of the time was actually really really bad.. but nonetheless all of them were hard. I wish I didn't have to go thru all of this. Part of me wishes I was little again.. so I would've have anythign to worry about anymore.. But im not.. and sometimes it rox, and I love it, but other times it really sux.. and all i do is literally crawl into a ball on the ground and cry.. it sux. But.. I know how to get over it fast, most of the time.

Dont get me wrong.. I have LOADS of good times in my life.. more good then bad. And I owe that to LOTS of people.. too many to name.. but name a few... I can do.
Jessica...Maggie...Sarah...Jill...Shauna...Brook...Tanya...Tricia...Andrea...
Kristie...Christine...Aisha...Taylor...(etc)
And those were only a few. My friends are really good and all, I love them SO much.. I dont know what I'd ever do without them.. thanx guys.. I love you so much... I know we'll always be there for each other.

Especially you Aisha and Jill.. we've been friends since grade 2.. since the Beginning.. and i love you so much, and I think its SOO cool that me and you are still really good friends.. and I love you both for it<3

byes

<3 Shayna

P.S you know who else I really love? Tyra Banks, Yeah yeah.. I know.. I'll never get to meet her.. but shes liek my hero.. I'd do anything.. I wish that I could meet her.. Thats my wish. To be like Tyra.. so I can meet Tyra. I Wish I could so badly.. And If I did.. I'd probably DIE from shock.. I love her soo much, she is SUCH a role model to me. I sign up for everything Tyra haha! including personal newsletters that she writes and sends out herself to everyone that signs up. I love you Tyra!! So much! I wish I could meet you :( <33333

Merry go round.. or life?

2006-11-07T19:02:00.000-08:00

Okay, So right now my life feels like one big merry-go-round. I'll feel alright with everything, and then suddenly something with happen, and it feels like I hit the bottom.. hard. So let me tell you that is NOT fun... not fun at all. Actually it really sucks. It hurts too, see.. when I fall sometimes I just wanna scream and get so mad... but on the other hand... my body wont let me. Its like it knows before I do.. that everything will turn out alright.. how does that work? I guess the brain is just a powerful thing. That and the mind... and no they are NOT the same... at all.

When I get back up on the other hand, it makes me wanna scream, and jump for joy, yet part of me wont let me do that either. Its like.. my brain knows not to.. but how? why?? There are so many questions I would like answered.. but I guess I'll just have to wait. Waiting is one of my pet peeves.. haha. When I wait for something, that I really want.. I get this feeling in my stomach, like I want somethign.... REALLY bad.. yet im not quite shure what it is.. ever have that feeling? Its like.. part of you is missing. I really hate it, but on the other hand I love getting up after a big fall. Its nice to know that your back on top of things.. that everythings under control agian.. that you can finally feel good again... that everythings alright. I love that part. I love it when you get the feeling that you've finally pulled yourself out of such a bad fall.. that your standing on your own two feet again, its alot better then falling. Trust me... a lot.

Anyways.. I gotta go, people are wanting me to hurry up and finish so they can read my blog. Byes! Love you all

<3 Shayna

Yesterday and today

2006-10-21T15:59:00.000-07:00

Okay so, Today I went to Jessicas new place.. because her mom and other adults were there. They got a pool table set up, so we played for 2 hours.. my feet are aching!!

Yesterday I went to the AYC dance. From 7-10pm.. its dancing non stop for three hours. Yeah it was VERY tiring, and VERY sweaty. Even just walking out of the crowd you cooled down, but then when you walked outside you were like.. :O OMG ITS SOOO NICE!! We were running to the bathroom every 30 min to get a drink from the taps cuz we only had 50 cents and we spent it on a water bottle and between me and my 9 other friends (Shauna, Maggie, Jessica, Sarah, Christine, Aisha, Andrea, Alyxandra & Jill) We each only got like... one sip.. MAYBE two if we were lucky, but there SO much fun.. even tho you go home sweaty and aching, its totally worth the pain.

We taught Shauna how to dance that night, YAY SHAUNA! And I even saw a couple kids from youth.. but I didn't talk to them.. I waved at one of them who was right in front of me.. and she looked at me and looked away.. she was in my grade too.. and even at the halloween party, theres no way she could've known who i was. But ohwell, I had 9 other friends to hang around with. Morgan even hung around us some of the time. And Tyler too. The whole time.. tyler didn't get a single dance.. and then suddenly at the end.. when they play the slow songs, a REALLY pretty girl asked him while we all had our backs turned.. and when we turned around, he was dancing with her! it was sooo cute. We were all like "awwwwe Tyler!!" I only danced with my friends tho. Like Shauna.. and Maggie and all of them.
It was the most fun I've had for the past 4-5 months.
It was truly a night to remember

<3 Shayna

The colour of my brain

2006-10-14T19:26:00.000-07:00

What Color is Your Brain?

At work or in school: I need to be "hands on": I like to play games, to compete, and to perform. I enjoy flexibility, changes of pace, and variety. I have difficulty with routine and structure. My favorite subjects are music, art, theatre, and crafts. I often excel in sports. I like solving problems in active ways and negotiating for what I want. I can be direct and like immediate results.
With friends: Planning ahead bores me because I never know what I want to do until the moment arrives. I like to excite my friends with new and different things, places to go, and romantic moments.
With family: I need a lot of space and freedom. I want everyone to have fun. It is hard for me to follow rules, and I feel we should all just enjoy one another.

Songs

2006-10-13T21:06:00.001-07:00

Okay, so maybe there not the happiest songs.. but my friends and I write songs. And these are some of our bands songs.. I will be posting more and I write them.

I can hear

At night I lay awake
Wondering how much I can take
I hear them saying all this stuff about me
Wondering if I can hear

Chorus:
But I can hear
Loud and clear
I can hear you
Want me out of here
Dont worry
you got your
Wish
Im leaving

They stare at me as I go past
Trying to hurt me
Getting in the last laugh
They whisper secrets about me
As I go
They think I cant hear them
but let me tell you
You're in for a rude awakening

Chorus:
But I can hear
Loud and clear
I can hear you
Want me out of here
Dont worry you got your
Wish
Im leaving

Dont mind me
Im just a thing of my past
Clinging onto any bit of hope
That will last
They think im gone
Now is the perfect time
Its time for me to shine
Im going to show them all
Just who they were dealing with
Its time are you ready?
Will you be perpared
Dont you worry little one..
Dont you be scared

Chorus:
But I can hear
Loud and clear
I can hear you
You say you want me to be gone
Just wait
Until its dawn
Then you'll be gone

Dont you worry little one
Dont you be scared
Its my turn now..
To be in controoooolllll
To be in controollllll.
To be in controoooolllll!

Clones

Starin in the mirror shes told to act like them
but why?
They're only clones.
Every single dirty rotten one of them

Clones I say.
They want me to be a clone.
Why should I?
You might as well isolate me
put me in my own lil dome.

She watches them as they walk
Copying their every movement
But thats just not for me
Not for me
Thats something I just
Cant do
They expect me to be a clone
Life ain't easy anymore
when theres no origanality

Clones I say.
They want me to be a clone.
Why should I?
Theres no origanality
No way to tell whose who

Tell me
Whats a world with no origanality?
Whats a world where everythings the same?
Whats a world with no uniqueness?
Whats a world where everyone acts liek a spoiled princess??
Whats a world......
Whats a world......
Thats my world....

I have more... but i cant find them right now. SO anywho... those are two of mine... people tend to think If i right sad songs it means im sad and that my songs relate to me.. they dont... just so you know. Haha!
Anyways.. gotta go.. i gotta get off the computer before i get a head ache
byebye

Shayna<3

Jessica

2006-10-09T12:39:00.000-07:00

Okay, so as some of you may already know, this is my "so called" best friend, Jessica. The only reason im saying "so called" Is because she hurt me yesterday, REAL bad.

Jessica called me and asked if she could come over last night, her mom and dad are having problems and her mom is moving out of the house, and she wanted to show me the house they got. Seeing as it was close by, i said shure.. not thinking any harm would come to going to see her new housee..... right?? Well, we get there, shes showing me the house.. and im like ( Kay wait, when I talk, its italic, when she talks its bold?? Ka peesh??) Okay, so i was like>
"When do you get the house??"
" We get the key in fourteen days!!"
" Thats awesome! so, when do u move in?"
" The end of the month"
" Sweet, so, you'll be having your birthday party in it??"
"No, we're going Camping, I already told you that"
" oh yeah, sweet... whose all going??"
" I already told you that too, your not coming... Just Maggie and Kevin"

Okay... GREAT so my so called best friend... isn't inviting me to her birthday... WHY NOT? Would you like to hear why?!
Because shees only allowed two people.........! I can understand why she invited Kevin instead of me... Kevin is like her brother.. but Maggie?! why?! Maggie was also a really good friend of mine.. but me and Jessica have been friends for longer... since Grade 4.. only one year less that Kevin and her have been friends... So why should Kevin come, and not me? I know this probably sounds really harsh right now.. but im really confused! I thought we were best friends! I know birthday partys aren't everything... but they're special. To me anyways.. espcially 13,16,and 20.

I called my friend Sarah and told her.. guess what? Shes not invited either! Whats wrong with us?! Its really starting to get on our nerves. Shes spending almost all of her time with Maggie.. AND all she ever talks about now.. is "Last time Maggie was over....." No offence... but honestly! We're getting replaced by the new kid!!!

Sorry, thats just my little rant. I gotta go.. Mary wants on.

Bye .. thanx for listening

<3MissShayna

Help ME!!

2006-10-08T18:05:00.000-07:00

Okay, for some reason the comments wont work now!! So if ANYONE can figure out why... I would LOVE it.. im on the verge of deleting my blog!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanx guys

<3MissShaynaa

.....

nvm its workin

Sports

2006-10-07T21:59:00.000-07:00

Okay so, this year, our school TOTALLY sux for the sports department! NO GRADE 8 GIRLS SPORTS! LIKE COME ON! Its not our fault all our girls are not athletic, why should we be punished for being active? It SO isn't fair!! We should be able to join the other teams! Its unfair to keep all of us non-active when we could be out there playing sports, getting in shape and having fun.. now im not saying we should force kids to be more active, but i honestly think it would help!

Honestly, WHAT IS TO BECOME OF MY GENERATION?! They cant even get up enough energy to play Volleyball, Basketball. Anyways, Mary is kicking me off the computer.. so i will write more about this tomorrow

Love you all

<3Miss Shaynieee

Test

2006-10-06T15:57:00.000-07:00

This is just a test to see if it will update my profile! For some reason its not working

Sunday

2006-10-01T16:40:00.000-07:00

Today I went to church. (like I do every Sunday)
Youth.. It was... okay. its too easy for all of us! No offense, but I was actually bored... like litteraly bored! It wasn't the youth I go to at night tho, It was just one of the moms decided to do youth.. and she was so excited.. I didn't mind going.. but it could've been more active, ya know? Not just like reading from the bible!!

Today there was a new couple in there, The girl was pregnant. We were praying for everyone and they both came down, so I got Marina to come pray with them for me. I was really getting a godly sence off of them, like a radience. It was powerful... extermely powerful. Like a force field for something. Well, thats what it felt like. But it was godly, cuz I could feel Gods Hand on them as we were praying, it was actually really cool! I wonder if they'll be coming back! Haha.

I love my church, It may be small, but its awesome. The only crappy thing is almost all the kids are leaving, Carson is the only kid around my age and then its 3 years older ( Mary ) and three years younger ( Marina). Dont get me wrong, I love Mary and Marina.. But its nice to have people my age there, ya know?? I really Miss the Alexanders, though the time was short with them.. it was meaningful. And now that they're gone.. its like a piece of me is missing! Its like.. I dont know. I hate it, all my friends are leaving the church! First Shanelle, Then Katrina, now the Alexanders! Grrr. Dont get me wrong, I still love church but part of me doesn't want to go anymore.. I know church isn't for your friends, its for God.. but... It sure helps to have friends there.

** GOING OFF TOPIC HEREEE!!**

**TOPIC CHANGE**

**THE ALEXANDERS**

So as I said before the Alexanders left the church, and they were like my best friends. They were always there for me.. if I needed someone to talk to.. Lise and Morgan would always listen. If I needed somewhere to stay to get away from family Drama, Lise would open up her doors for me. I felt so welcommed there.. I felt like part of the family, Like a daughter, a sister.. this probably sounds SUPER corny, but its totally true. Morgan treated me like an older sister, same with Emily, Hailey and Faith.. and Lise treated me like a daughter. I loved it, I felt so.. loved! So.. Apreciated.

Now their gone, they moved to Prince George, and it REALLY sux, but, im not dwelling on that... im happy for them. They found a huge house.. and lots of great friends! They already bought a kitten named Mocha.. and it sounds like there having a blast. I still get to talk to them.. just not as much as I wanted. Not as much as before

Anyways.. Lise.. Morgan.. if your reading this.. I want you to know.. how much I miss you guys! I hate it that you guys moved.. but im glad God is blessing you so much. I hope to come visit you soon!! Love youu

Love you all blog readers!!

<3shayna

Youth

2006-09-28T15:37:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to the youth group at Central Heights, called lifeline. I didn't think I would like it, I was begging my mom to keep me home... She made me go tho, she said I would love it, but I still didn't believe her.

As soon as we got in.. my ears ached.. it was SO loud... the boys i mean... Screaming and yelling, and wrestling, and just having fun.. the girls weren't as loud as the boys... obviously. We get in ( mom and me ) and we go to find Phil, the Youth Pastor. He talked with us for like a second, and then a girl stepped in, one of MANY Youth Leaders, her name was Amanda, otherwise known as Mandy, she was really awesome. She spent like almost the whole entire time with me..I didn't know anyone but her.. so I just hung out with her.

We basically play games and stuff for an hour, and then we listen to Phil preach, hes actually.. like... super funny! Hes a great pastor for youth! After we go back into the crazy loud room, and play more games. I sorta felt out of place there and I went to the back of the room and stood leaned against the wall.. i didn't know what to do. Suddenly, a girl from my Hip Hop class ( which btw, I've NEVER talked to ) walks up to me and says " Would you like to hang out with me and mmy friends?" alright!!! So her name is Sarah, shes appearently a lot nicer than I thought! Her and her friends like.. welcomed me into there group right away! It was soo awesome! We played ping pong for a bit, and then we left and sat in the hall because it was like.. major loud in there.

Then Sarahs friends parents came and they went home about 5 min later Sarahs Dad came, so I was just standing at the door, I saw Mandi, but she was talking with a leader so I didn't wanna interupt her, ya know?? Suddenly she turns around and shes like... "HEY! I was JUST telling him how I couldn't find you??" Then she turned to the other leader, "Wasn't I just telling you??" We laughed for a bit and then talked about Hip Hop.. and School.. and how she cant remember names! I told her she reminded me of my mom. My mom is really bad with names.. but shes getting better (hehe mom if your reading this... :D LOVE YOU!hehe)

Anyways, Youth went really well that nite, i thought it would be crap.. but it was like... major fun.. and like.. major loud. And I cant WAIT for next week!!

I should go now, I gots some homework to do... WoOt<3
Byebye<3

<3Shayna

(P.S the <3 is a heart, just in case you were all wondering, if you turn the < around and make it point down and put the 3 on top... its a heart!! :D haha <3 byebye)

Yay!!

2006-09-23T09:59:00.000-07:00

Okay, so.. like.. PARENTS ARE HOME! yay! flew in last night.
Jessica came over, she deicded to make cookies and wait for them so she could say hi to mom and dad. Haha! Marina and Emma also came over because their parents were picking up my parents from the airport, so we baked cookies for them, "Dad's cookies" ( Altho we should have put more oatmeal in it... but oh well)

We got told they would be home around 11.. so we were making cookies and fooling around,amd the make up war paint just HAD to be involved in all of this, and we decided to make up a dance for them. It like.. 9, so we start and guess what... not even a minute into the song, and mom yells... "Shayna!!! Aren't you gonna come upstairss??" CRAP! So we all RAN to the bathroom and scrub our faces clean.. it will have to be saved for another day.. oh well eh? Maybe next time....

But ANYWAYS, Im SO glad their home.. as most of you probably know. Even if we're not doing anything amazing, its just nice to cuddle with them.. nice to have them here.... after all that time away from them, ya know?

Anyways, I should go.. I'll talk to chu all laterrrrr

<3Shayna

Hip Hop

2006-09-19T19:12:00.000-07:00

okay, So today is my first hip hop class.. Im SO nervous..! I Make shure to look like im ready to dance hip hop, but not to go over the top. Im all excited, I get there.. and my stomache turns... 4 girls... 2 are best friends... 2 are best friends... which leaves me... alone. Greeeeaaaaaat. That was the first fault... Second, I wore FLIP FLOPS!! haha yea, i know.. im genious! THIRD, My flip flops where are sweaty so I kept slipping.. and Last but not least, My hair was a fluff ball!

Yup, I had fun.. I picked up the choreography well.. I think, Brittany Richmond ( my teacher ) Said I was doing good... So, I hope I really am.. and shes not just being nice. Shes a really kewl teacher, She prays at the beginning of the class, and shes really fun.. And she laughs in the middle of dancing! Its Awesome, I love it!

I dont really have much to write about today... I just thought I should write about my dance so everyone knows what Im up too these "parentless days".

I talked with mrs.Majewski about my parents gone.. In my journal of course.. Shes a really good help! Im so glad to be in her class! LoL, I actually cried writing my journal one time! Haha! I miss them so much and I cant believe its only... 3 days until they come hommeee!!

I've talked with Patti and Rachel when they were gone.. Patti about friends "stuff" and Rachel.. actually I dont even know.. we talked about so many different things, we just laughed and had a fun time on the phone. I love Patti and Rachel for being there for me! You guys mean so much to me, and im glad your there if I need prayer or.. just someone to talk to!

Anyways.. I had loads of homework.. and i gotta go!!
Byebye!!<3

Today.. I think

2006-09-14T19:04:00.000-07:00

i Hello Oh faithful few that read my blog. Haha

Today was just like any other day, School.. Car pool.. home. Oh Joy, haha.

My friends keep telling me I should work on getting my singing to take me somewhere, but WHERE?? I have like.. NO connections..!!
Anyways, I tried to get a clip of me singing on here.. couldn't figure out how.. :( Maybe next time!! if anyone knows how.. that would be AWESOME if you could tell me.

My parents are gone.. as you already know.. it kinda sucks, I mean.. I like Margie, but she basically is TOO quiet. When she calls me and Mary for dinner, we can barely hear her... When she called me, I didn't even know she was calling.. so mary just said louder "Shayna!! Dinner!" And i heard right away and came! I think she thinks im not listening to her.. but its not that.. I CANT HEAR HER!! haha She needs to speak up... a lot. Shes really nice tho, but shes not strict, and TOO quiet, I guess there is such a thing as too quiet!

Other than that, everything is going fine, Mary made tacos tonite, well she made the shells(THANK YOU PATTI CULLEY!) I made the meat. It was GOOD if i do say so myself, hehe!

Yesterday I called Rachel to ask her if I could put her as my emergency contact for school, and we ended up talking for like.. 45 min! hah! Not really on a particular subject, we just rambled on, shes soo funney. i loved it.

Schools.. meh, cant complain, its school. WAYY to much stuff to carry home after school.. im used to just a back pack.. now its a binder, and my Math textbook, and my Science textbook, and my purse, and my ANYTHING else i brought! Haha, its too much to me!

Any ways, i should go.. I will blog again soon! byebye Faithful bloggers! (hehe I still think thats funney)

bibi
Shayna<3

"Dear Diary"

2006-09-08T07:20:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, my parents left for Wales, England, and then Scotland. I miss them.

My school (ASIA) decided to start a disrict wide spelling bee. And we've only been in school like...3 DAYS! And you can bet, my teacher is prolly gonna make me go into it. Joy. And you can bet that was sarcasim. My friend put up my hand, but im too scared to go into front of the whole school... AND to go disrict wide online. Its crazy! Mrs.Majewski already told me Im prolly in it. IM not to excited... what if I spell a really easy word wrong? Like silence? I know i can spell silence, but in front of all those people I might spell it wrong and that would be emabarassing!

Yesterday, my teacher came up to me after class.(Mrs Majewski) She said to me "Are you okay? You seem really quiet today! And why wouldn't you share you're writing with the class? Thats not the Shaina I know!"
I told her "The Shaina you know, has changed a lot since grade 5.... And im fine..."
"Are you shure?"
"Well, my parents are leaving for England today.."
"For how long?"
"Two weeks"... Then I dont know why, but i started crying.. Yeah shure, imma miss my parents but I didn't think I would.. THAT much!!
Mrs Majewski looked at me for a second, and then said "Awwwee! Shaina! You'll be fine!" Shes a really awesome teacher im glad im in her class! She told me if I ever need to talk.. shes always there.

I guess I really do miss them. My spirit does anyways, more than I know. See My parents haven't really gone away for this long without us... ever. They dont usually travel, I mean.. My dad goes to confrences in Toronto, and Same with my mom. My mom and dad were going to go to Venezuela.. But my dad didn't have enuf money to go in time. So he sent mom by herself. And she had loads of fun! but they've never really gone at the same time without us.. Its kinda wierd coming home from school and having them not there,, ya know?Its really crazy...

But I gotta go and finish waiting till we get driven to school.. I asked to be woken up at 6:45 so I could shower... and Margie woke me up at 6:05. I was like... noooooo! I was sooo tuired.. and I got already 40 min before we actually go.. lol! So i gotta go... byebye<3<3

Shaina<3

Duke<3

2006-09-02T15:50:00.000-07:00

Dukey

My totally sweet Dog

This is my Dog ,Duke. Hes not technically my dog, hes my dads. But my dad cant rightfully call him 'his dog'. Me and Mary take care of Duke. Hes a really spazzy dog, but I love him anyways. Dad doesn't like Duke because of that. Im not saying my dad is bad.. or wrong (I dont usually like spazzy dogs either) Im just saying he should keep up with his respoinsiblities wayy more!

Duke was doing really great until one weekend he bit too people.. not badly tho. Not that im making an excuse for him biting.. it was wrong I know. And ever since then it seems dad doesn't like him anymore. Which is Sad... Cuz now dad always talks about getting rid of Duke for a quieter more people friendly Dog. Yea that'd be nice... but we cant just give up on Dukey boy!

Rite now hes on Pro Zack. :P Yup A Dog on Happy Pills. Hes really calm now.. and hes been doing really good. I think he'll be fine around people.. but once again.. no one trusts him but me. BEFORE he was on his pills I had my friend Jessica over.. and he was FINE with her.. he was playing with and wrestling.. and now everyones afraid once again to let him near people.. but y?

Hes sucj a good dog.. And i wish they would give them a chance....

Camping at Vaseux

2006-08-28T19:04:00.000-07:00

Sorry folks! I've been gone for two weeks so I haven't really been able to write on my blog in that time.(No Computer at my Grammas OR Vaseux) So Im back and I cant wait to tell you all about my trip.

First week just my mom, my sister and me, went up to stay with my gramma. Gramma Sam we all call her. Shes doing pretty well.. but her feet hurt her a lot. Sometimes she can barely even stand up, and then she soaks her feet and crys.. its hard to see my gramma cry. I look up to my gramma. She was run over by a drunk driver when she was 10 and had to learn everything over again.. and shes still alive now.. shes 84. Shes my hero.

Altho I love my grammas, it can kinda be boring.. especially when the only other person around my age there, my sister, brought a friend. And she never really let me do anything with her.. so I was kinda left with my mom. Not saying my mom isn't fun.. but you know.. I need more kid company. Ya know?? imagine how my mom felt! but atleast she had her sisters.. and her mom..!

But enuf about then.

At Vaseux.

I cried the first day we got there... sat on the swings rested my head on the chains.. and balled my eyes out. Why? I missed Jessica.. My one and only friend left in the world( At the time). And then I started thinking about Sarah.. what I could've done to make the fight not so big.. Im not trying to play the innocent.. I know I screwed up just as much as she did, in my own ways. I had to admit it to myself. I missed Sarah. Loads. like.. CRAZY LOADS! After all, we WERE bestest friends... such good friends NO ONE could ever seperate us. Anytime one of us got an idea in our head, We did it.. no matter how hard it would be.

Vaseux was.... for the most part fun. Sometimes hanging out with only little kids got to my head.. and I prolly snapped at one of them.. a little more then i should've.... oops!
Hey! I mean.. its not really my fault! I needed someone there.. MY age.. or at least more mature then 10. Like Marina for example.. shes 10.. three years difference... but it doesn't feel like it. Shes really mature, and shes just a sweet heart! I love her to death! WE can hang out for FOREVER and we never tire of each other. At least.. I dont.. I dunno if she tires of me.. : Lets hope not!! haha. Me and Marina found a fish inside of a clam!! It was soo kewl! but it stunk... REALLY bad.. like.. rotten fish!! (hehe) We also found a snake ( dead one) Stuck in some washed up sea weed. Kinda gross.. but kewl. ALSO me and Marina went Fishing and it was the first fish marina ever caught without her dad in the boat!! So many memories!

Hmm any other memories worth remembering?? Taylor and I went fishing one morning Becuz Mike and his girls went out before us and each of them caught a fish. So I asked Mary, and she didn't want to go, so I resorted to Taylor. Taylor is Marys friend, shes awesome!! As we were zipping up our life jackets and slowing paddling out into the water she warns me. " Dont be suprised if we dont catch anything, I've grown to acceptthe fact that Im bad luck. Every time me and Mary go, we never caught a THING!"I just laughed and said "dont worry about it" 15 min later, and she catches a Fish! Guess Im good luck! :D It wasn't HUGE but it wasn't small either. It was maybe... 8-9 inches.. hey im not all that smart, I could be over exaderating, or underexaderating, but I dont think so. We brought it in cuz we didn't want it to die.. even tho it was in a bucket of lake water, she got her camera and she got me to take two pictures of her fish! She was sooo happy. It was her first Bass and her first Fish caught in that Lake. When we told my mom we caught something she said "I knew you would! I was praying for you two!!" Then Mike comes around, and says "And I was praying for protection, the wind was pretty strong." But hey, we made it there and back.. The canue could've tipped a couple times.. but thank goodness they were praying!

I never really did catch anything that year, but I dont really need to! Im just happy when someone else catches a fish, they're happiness makes me feel happy for them.. and I dont really care that I never caught anything!

Me and Marina also organized the kids and put on two dance shows... one with two dances.. Me and Marina's Dueo. And then A group dance. This was our end Pose. Thats Emma on top, Geli on the left, Me in the middle, Marina on the right, and then Xandra up front.

The second nite we waited till it was PITCH black and used Glow sticks.. We just took the group dance and fixed it up.. it needed A LOT more time and effort put into it!!
.......................iiiits...........

GLOW STICK TIMEE!!

IM blue, same with Geli and Emma. Xandra is Green and Marina is Orange(which sometimes looks red...)

Well I should be going! I'll re post my post about my puppy Dukey.. maybe tomorrow or something! Talk to you then!!

Love ya

<3Shaina

Squabbling

2006-08-11T00:36:00.000-07:00

Two days ago, I got into BIG trouble. I took another one of my sisters things without asking.. and I told her after I already took it. She got very mad... and then mom got mad. And mom and I fought over msn for almost 45 min. I dont like fighting with my mom.. its crappy. But I guess when you be bad, it just happens. Im trying to stop. I dont know what Im thinking when i take her stuff.. I guess im not really thinking. Its very wierd. Becuz when I take her stuff... I dont remember anything that I've been told before.. its like my mind kinda goes blank! I know thats not an exuse for taking her stuff... but Its really weird. And I can never remember what I was thinking when i take it. Mom always asks me the same question.. 'WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!' and I honestly... dont know.

My punishment for taking Marys things is I have to help her with her chores and cleaning her room. But before she assigns something to me she has to check with mom first. I think I deserve a punishment.. but i didn't particularily like this one.... Haha

Me and my sister tend to fight a lot. Over the tinyest things! Like... mom will ask whose sock is in the hallway... and we both say its not ours.. and then we fight over it. We fight over things that DONT EVEN MATTER!! I really hate fighting with my sister. Because I see all these people who dont talk to there sisters anymore.. and I dont want it to be like that. I love my sister.. so much. But I've never told her that. I dont know why I haven't... Mary isn't really the sensitive one. If I ever told her... shed just be like.. "Cool." And then it would be all akward. Haha, but she knows I love her

Anyways. I hope I wont get in trouble again soon! I want to go to the movies today with Jessica to see 'Step up' or 'World Trade Center'. I hope to be seeing one of them before I go on Vacation. My family and two other families from our church are going up to the Okanogan for a vacation. Its a really nice little place. With our own private beach... and the waters really nice. Its good for fishing, and its just all around awesome! the kids have loads of fun swimming and playing with each other.. and the adults have fun talking and swimming. At nite sometimes we play board games all together. Its lots of fun, and I CANT WAIT to go!

I also cant wait for it to be over! Im soooo excited to go back to school! This year my school is switching buildings, so me and my friend Jessica are so excited to get to school! We hope we're in the same class! If we're not.. we're not gonna be too happy! But Im glad I get to go to this school! I love all the teachers there.. and all my friends, and the fine arts of course! Haha!

Well anyways, I guess I should get to calling Jessica to go to the movies!!

BiBi<3<3

Sarah and Kevin

2006-08-02T23:37:00.000-07:00

Sarah and Kevin used to be two of my very best friends. We did everything together! Me and Sarah even bought our first purses together. Kevin, He ALWAYS stuck up for us no matter what, even if it was us that was doing the wrong thing. Hes been friends with jess since grade 3, and with her every step of the way. Me and Kevin have been friendds since grade four and with me every step of the way. Untill now. Sarah and I have been friends since grade 3 we've done EVERYTHING together. Sarah and Jess have been friends since grade 4, and done EVERYTHING together. Until now.

Sarah

Almost a month ago now, I signed up on this website ,A modeling one ,just for fun, and I got accepted. Im pretty sure thats what set Sarah off. She started flipping out at me over webcam and msn. She told me I wasn't model matieral, and the modeling agency wouldn't accept such an ugly person.. so i MUST be lying. That hurt.. ALOT.. but then it keeps going. "You must be mistaken, they must have told you to try out for plus sized modeling, Becuz you're soo fat! your like.. what 130 pounds?" That hurt... becuz I am almost 130 pounds. It didn't really bother me at first.. becuz I dont care about my weight alot.. i dont wanna be a stick.. ya know? That not the worst of it.. it keeps going "we were never that good of friends.. you know why? cuz your fat, thats why! I hate you so much.. you such a *BEEP*" Oh yeah, and you can bet that hurt. I wont waste your time by telling you the rest. Lets just say, she got pretty mean. And you can bet, I got pretty hurt, which probably made me meaner then i should ever be. But I was really hurt, and i couldnt control myself.

One more thing sarah said about my dearest friend Jill. "Hey, did you hear Jill smokes pot?" me " Sarah, Jill doesn't smoke pot, she never has, and she never will" Sarah "oh yes she has! Ask Kevin!She smoked it with him and Josh" So I ask Kevin, and what does Kevin say? " what the heck?! no!! I haven't seen Jill all summer!" So I tell that to Sarah, and shes says, "he's lying, ask Josh" I ask Josh, and what does Josh say? "No! I Haven't seen Jill sence the end of the year party!!" Tell that to Sarah, but NOOOOO! They're lying, and Jill smokes pot. Can you say recipe for disaster? Eventually I told Jill, and Jill usually isn't the type to get angry, but when someone spreads such HORRIBLE rumors about her, you cant blame 'er.. can you?

Dont get me wrong, I loved Sarah. We were tight, ya know? We were best friends! She helped me with everything I ever wanted to do... Made me feel like I could totally do it! But, she hears rumors, UNTRUE rumors, and believes them. Thats the one sad thing about it. Im going to miss Sarah. We can not be mad at each other.. but i am not gonig to be her friend again... not after what she did to me, and Jill, and Jessica

Kevin

One day we were friends.. the next he did the same thing! "Your so fat, you're soo ugly. Change your Display Picture you're making me barf! I hate you, I never wanna see ur ugly face again" And Crap like that. I'd have to say, It hurt more then what Sarah did. Kevin and I were WAYY closer then me and Sarah. Then Jessica got into the fight, becuz she heard what Kevin did to me ( She was sleeping over ) And she got mad at him for being to thoughtless to me. And that set him off, he started Swearing, and throwing come backs.. and capitalizling every word over the computer so we REALLY knew he was angry! We both said we didnt want to be his friend anymore.. not after we realized, how angry he could get... imagine if we were there! And he was mad at us?! Hed be like.. hitting us.. hard. Its kinda scary. But he said he didn't care... but hes now trying to be nice! Its very confusing. Some days hes really nice, even tho we aren't friends.. and it brings back memories.. I really like being Kevins friend, and im sad that we aren't friends anymore. But I dont wanna be the one that he hurts really badly when he gets angry! I just dont wanna get hurt. I know many of you are thinking... what hes just Kevin! But are you forgetting maybe, what he did to ram? Ram could've passed out, he could've died! Kevin was like.. punching him in the face.. stangling him. It took four teachers to get Kevin off of Ram.Yea, thats why were scared.

I dont know... how I could ever trust him with anything again. For example.. he talks crap about me behind my back.. and then he tells me hes my friend. The very same night.. he starts yelling at me over msn.. saying that Im ugly and crap AGAIN! He even told me to go kill myself. Hes like.. you know what, you should just go kill yourself now, go die. You must be embarassed that no one believes you could've been a model, so you might as well not live anymore. I told him I didn't care if no one believed me... I didn't need anyone to believe me for it to be true.. ya know? Then he starts tell other people rite? And then they're all like.. Shayna a model? Ew! The only way she'd get accepted is if the modeling agency was.. blind.. deaf... crippled. Shes way to.. Ugly.. Smelly.. Short. Just plain Ugly. Oh gee thanx for telling me Kevin! Then hes like.. see? Everyone thinks ur ugly! ... You can die now...

Now, before we were fighting I could tell Kevin everything.. so once I told him.. that being a pastors daughter was hard.. the pressure to be perfect.. act perfect.. look perfect! Its hard sometimes! Thats why I like our small church becuz most of the time.. They dont expect that of me. But I expect that of myself, ya know? And some times it seems like my parents do to. Its a lot of stresss.

But anyways, so I told that to Kevin right? When he tells me to go kill myself, I said to him.. "No thanx Kevin, I like my life" and he just HAD to say "Obviously not, you said you hated it, the pressure of always being perfect!" Which basically said to me 'if you hate having to be perfect.. just die.'

And now you can bet, im feeling VERY depressed rite now, and eating lots of 'comfort food' (ie; getting Cacee to walk down to the candy store with me so i could buy an ice cream drum stick and a chocolate bar, and I've been drinking smoothies.. eating Yogurt, dry cereal, anything I can get my hands on. Can u say FAT and PRAYER? yea, thats what I need the most rite now. Not so much fatty stuff and Prayer.. and lots of it.

Yea shure, somtimes I dont really like my life, but I live with it.. work around it. I wont deny it. Every kid feels the same way every once and a while.Dont mean I hate anything about my life, and I've never really regret something. I'd rather regret something for doing it, then regret not doing it.

Getting off topic. Sarah and Kevin really hurt me.. a lot. It sux to be treated like that by two of ur best friends. I hope I dont have to see them again. After all that crap they put me through.. what I need right now, the MOST is to relax with some of my real friends. The ones I know wont turn on me no matter what. Sarah and Kevin were friends that I got into little fights all the time with.. So I guess, they weren't to of my closest friends, but they were good friends nonetheless. Well tomorrow, I wanna go to the Alexanders.. spend time with the people that really care about me. That wont turn on me. But the people I really should be spending time with, is my family. Which I should be going to spend time with right now..

Good nite Friends.<3>

My Gurlies

2006-07-28T11:22:00.000-07:00

These are My gurlies. Hailey,Emily,Emma,Marina&Morgan.
I love them soo much! But Morgan, Emily, and Hailey are leaving soon! They are moving to Prince George August 22nd. I am going to miss them soooo much! I cant believe they are really going! If you would like to see more poems about them go to my website
www.justanother--ordinarygirl.piczo.com And click on the Alexanders page. (Dont forget to sign the guest book! :P

Moi.... <3

2006-07-13T17:01:00.001-07:00

The artist <3>

The songs I write

2006-07-13T17:01:00.000-07:00

I dont know what gets inside of me when I write songs... But all my songs turn out.. fairly decent, but mostly sad I've noticed.

This is mi song to comfort those who have been thru Child Abuse, or just hard times

Strong All Along
Shes sits in a corner
Sobbing into her hands
She feels so alone
She has no place to go
No place to call home

She hears them curse.
Yelling her name
Mad 'cause of work
So they find her to blame

All They feel like doing
Is hiding from the world
The world hasn't treated them right
With the world they always fight
Forced into darkness
When they want in the light..
With the world they fight
..with the world they fight

Hes shut up all day
And into the night
Been locked up for 3 years,
Has never seen the light
He wants his mommy,
But shes no where to be seen
Looking at his clothes
That are too stained to clean.

He cries everynight
Trying to find some right
Calls for his mommy
But only hears himself
Waiting for her to reply...
Laying in his cell.
He bites back his tears..
Trying to be strong
When hes yet to learn
Hes been strong all along

All They feel like doing
Is hiding from the world
The world hasn't treated them right
With the world they always fight
Forced into darkness
When they want in the light..
With the world they fight
.. with the world they fight

They begin to fight
Finding themselves becoming strong
Trying to find a way out
A place where they belong

Escape little ones
To a place where you can be free
Grow little ones be the best you can be
But always remember
Its what makes you strong
Dont forget your past,
You've been strong all along.

All They feel like doing
Is hiding from the world
The world hasn't treated them right
With the world they always fight
Forced into darkness
When they want in the light..
With the world they fight
.. with the world they fight

Cant Hide
How long must I wait?
How long must I do this?
How long will you let this go on?
Im hurting, cant you see?
My heart is hurting,
Aching,
Breaking
Cant you see me?
Can you see what this is doingAm I invisble..?
What can I do?
To be seen by you

Around you I feel naked
Alone and afraid.
You make me feel Invisble
Like my lifes a charade
Im hurting, Cant you see?
My Head, is hurting
Aching
Breaking
Cant you see me?
Can you see what this is doing?
Am I invisible..?
What can I do?
To be seen by you
I feel like im Naked
I feel like Im trapped
My life feels like one big merry-go-round
Sometimes we go up,
Sometimes we go down
I feel like I wont make it through the night
My heart is Aching,Throbbing,
Killing me.
Cant you see me?
Can you see what this is Doing?
Am I Invisble..?
What can I do?
To be seen by you
My face
It doesn't seem right
I scratch it all through the night
You make me feel naked...I cant hide (x2)
Ohooohhh, I cant hideee from youuuuuu

Today

2006-07-13T13:28:00.000-07:00

Today Im at the Culleys house.. Its been VERY eventful... (eg. Jeremy gets sent to room... telling us hes peed on his train tracks. Trying to make cookies without the oven on, Playing hide and seek only hiding RIGHT before they catch you) Its been fun... but I'd have to say... The cookie dough made it all worth it!! lol**insider** Geli and Morgan! Jeremy has now decided he eats Bigger Girls... he comes FLYING around the corner, jumps on me and go "AHHHGEEHSDJIRDHAHHHHH!!!!" Pawing at my back, Head, hands...Anything he gets ahold of... excluded all those... 'special' areas. Hes an awesome kid... yeah sure he has attention problems... but hes a cutie

Today is a New Day

2006-07-13T10:54:00.000-07:00

Okay well, so far today, I have almost nothing. Burned a CD, did some weeding, Cleaned up a container that i had outside for almost a week now(And you can imagine how much fun that was) I've spent most of my day on the computer... I feel so lazy! I need to get out and do something... ANYTHING! This house is sooo boring! Mom and Dad went out to the Coffee shop, One sister is working.. and the other has been sleeping for who knows how long! So... I'd rather not watch TV so Im stuck on the computer.

I had a REALLY freaky dream last night. I was in the HUGE house with all of the church.. The Baumans, The Culleys, My Family, The Thiessens... etc. And we weren't there one day, and my flip flops went missing when it was time to go. So, I didn't really think much of it, and got into the car... we came back the next day with that church... and After a long day of playing I walked into a room that resembeled my bedroom... and all my pairs of flipflops where there! And i was like! PRAISE GOD! I picked up one pair and put them on my feet. I turned to the door... and there was a girl, That didn't belong to our church... she had raven black hair... and black clothes.. and snow white skin. She grabbed my hand, and i dropped to my knees, thanking her for bringing my shoes back to me... She looked at me funny, and began walking out the door with me still holding her hand... I tried to let go, but our hands had... almost melded together! I began to SCREAM for My oldest sister.... I was shreiking, and getting dragged by this LITTLE TINY girl! Finally I kicked at our hands and they broke free... All i remember doing is having her staring at me as I ran away... Im not sure what would've happened if I stayed with her... Something just didn't feel right... ya know?